The Best Part of Doula Work...That No One Talks About
We asked doulas what they loved about this incredible profession. They answered and it might surprise you. Yes, they get to witness the miracle of birth, the strength of women, the transition from one to two that is childbirth, and so much more. But one of the best parts of being a doula that they mentioned was working with the partner.
Here are their answers about one of the best parts of doula work...that no one talks about!
“My favorite part about working alongside a dad during a birth is getting to see each of them fall deeper in love with one another as they bring their new baby earth side!”
“I love getting to work with partners. So often, our culture looks at dads negatively in birth. Movies show women wanting to claw their husband's eyes out or blaming him for causing it all. In reality, when couples are prepared, dads are loving and supportive and the birthing woman has a strong need for his closeness and all the nurturing he has to offer. It's such a beautiful sight to see.”
“I love that I give the partner an opportunity to be a focus in the birth. They know Mom best and can give her the love she needs. I get to provide the partner with a boost of confidence with positive support and feedback! They get to take a well deserved break without feeling guilt...being a supportive partner is a big job and they need to eat and go to the bathroom too!
I can do the tasks like filling up water, juice, grabbing food and telling family that things are going great and that they will know as soon as baby arrives (kindly of course), while the partner gets to focus on encouraging and loving Mom. I can catch the partner's eyes when I see fear creeping in and send positive vibrations with my smile and nod.
I make sure that after baby comes, the new family gets that precious time together and that the moments are captured with everyone in the picture. I remind the nurse to pass baby to the partner for skin to skin cuddles when mom heads off to the bathroom for the first time. I love working with partners and helping them feel like they played an awesome role in the birth.”
“My favorite thing working with dads is witnessing their true love for their bride, their anticipation right before birth and the instant transition into his daddy world with his new baby.”
Krisha Crosley, Dallas/Fort Worth Doula
“Dads are by far one of my favorite parts about my job. When I first meet them at childbirth class, they come in quiet and unsure. By the end they are confident and excited! Then when I am lucky enough to be at the birth as their doula it is so beautiful to watch. To see the love and care dad has towards mom leaves me speechless. But then, when they meet their baby for the first time, it’s even better. Watching that bond built between dad and baby is so sweet. For me it reaffirms the vital roles that dads play. I really do love watching these "manly men" turn into "gentle giants" as they become a father.”
“Where can I start? I love working with dads! I love seeing them fall in love again and again in the birth room. I love seeing them find strength they didn't know that they have. And when they meet their babies for the first time? I melt.”
Supporting and witnessing the power and tenderness of the father during the birth is perhaps one of the best kept secrets of doula work. Birth is such an all-powerful event, it makes sense to support not just mom, but her partner, so that they are both honored through this transformation.